Cheers and Boos: Tuesday

Power up an ally on Tuesday

The midterm elections aren’t over until this US senator from Georgia crosses the finish line in 14 days with more runoff votes than his MAGA opponent: the werewolf who finances secret abortion and kills vampires with a fake police badge. who has an obsession with gay sheep. (Long story.)

–

Read more here about the urgency of the moment Daily cos Election team manager David Nir here. And if you can help financially, the ActBlue link is here. Reverend Warnock urgently needs help to avoid the worst case scenario: electing an incompetent GOP jerk he needs I laughed aid.

cheers and boos to Tuesday, November 22, 2022

Note: Here’s what you can expect from C&J for the rest of the week: regular C&J tomorrow, special Thanksgiving edition Thursday morning, who won the week Poll Friday, Monday off, Tuesday back home, cats and dogs living together, mass hysteria, and Grandma’s sour apple-olive marshmallow jelly you Will eat because he worked on it for two consecutive weekends. Thanks. —Manager

–

By the numbers:

Days until the beginning of Hanukkah: 26

days until Valley Forge Beer and Cider Festival: eleven

Amount by which employers expect to increase their salary budgets on average in 2023, according to a Willis watson towers poll: 4.6%

Salary budgets last year increased as much: 2007

Amazon Age Light since last Saturday: fifteen

Estimated number of pumpkin pies served at Thanksgiving: 50 million

Number of turkeys that will kill their captors this week and escape on motorcycles: 22

–

Puppy Day Photo: In Tonawanda, New York, the first snowfall of a puppy…

–

HEALTH to cleaning the house. republicans in Pennsylvania they’re feeling the sadz this morning. Their majority in the House of Representatives, which they assumed they could use for evil until the end of time, suddenly and unexpectedly slipped away over the weekend. Even Another victim of the midterm elections:

The Democrats have turned the tables Pennsylvania state house of representatives, unexpectedly gaining control of the legislative chamber for the first time in a decade.

The Associated Press confirmed that Democrats had won 12 seats, enough to maintain a narrow majority in the state House, on Saturday when it called a pending final race for Democratic nominee Melissa Cerrato. […]

Democrats will still have to compromise with Pennsylvaniathe GOP-controlled state Senate, but they could use the House to advance important priorities, including efforts to expand voting rights and protect abortion access.

Adding to the importance of the moment: Rep. Joanna McClinton is expected to become the first black woman to serve as Speaker of the House. Now thatThat’s what I call Democrats who open a can of “wha-pa-ss!” (I need to start writing more of these 3 am ideas. That’s pure gold right there.)

P.S. Meanwhile, at the federal level…

–

HEALTH to a cherished Christmas tradition: taking your life in your hands. Thanksgiving looms like a 20-pound bowl of mashed potatoes, and AAA predicts that with Joe Biden still in charge, everyone is in a better mood this year, the shots and boosters are on, and that means there will be a lot more travelers screaming, swearing, and smelling a little game between now and next Tuesday :

AAA predicts that 54.6 million people will travel 50 miles or more from home this Thanksgiving. That’s a 1.5% increase from 2021 and 98% of pre-pandemic volumes. This year is projected to be the third busiest for Thanksgiving travel since AAA began tracking in 2000.

Most travelers will be driving to their destinations, just like last year. Nearly 49 million people are expected to travel by car. While Thanksgiving road trips are up slightly (0.4% more than in 2021), car trips remain 2.5% below 2019 levels.

Air travel increased almost 8% in 2021, with 4.5 million Americans flying to their Thanksgiving destinations this year. That’s an increase from more than 330,000 travelers and nearly 99% of 2019 volume. […] Americans are also increasing travel in other modes of transportation. More than 1.4 million travelers leave the city for Thanksgiving by bus, train, or cruise. That’s a 23% increase from 2021 and 96% from 2019 volume.

If you’re going to be among road commuters, be careful, wear a mask, and practice common sense driving etiquette: your right hand is for texting and your left hand is for flipping the bird.

HEALTH to save our souls. On November 22, 1906, “SOS” was adopted as a distress signal at the International Radiotelegraphy Convention in Berlin. Of course, today there is an alternative sign that means the same thing: “GOP”.

–

SHORT CORD REST

–

–

SHORT END SANITY BREAK

–

BOOS to today’s edition of AND THAT’S HOW YOU KNOW HE ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY, TOTALLY DID IT. courtesy of NBC News:

Conservative Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito on Saturday strongly denied any involvement in the leak of the outcome of a 2014 ruling in a lengthy statement issued in response to a New York Times report.

The Times story said that former anti-abortion activist Reverend Rob Schenck learned of the outcome of the Burwell v. Hobby Lobby before the decision was issued in June 2014. … Alito said in a statement obtained by NBC News that any suggestion that he or his wife leaked the ruling is “completely false.”

This has been today’s edition of AND THAT’S HOW YOU KNOW HE ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY, TOTALLY DID IT.

HEALTH to November 22. A lot of good things happened on this date in history: the pirate Blackbeard’s reign of terror ended when he was caught. (The government’s terror threat alert level was lowered from “Skull and Crossbones” to “Wood Leg and Grog Pint”); Ravel is stunning Bolero was performed for the first time; the Germans were surrounded at Stalingrad; Margaret Thatcher retired; Billy Jean King, Rodney Dangerfield, Hoagy Carmichael, Mark Ruffalo, Terry Gilliam, and Jamie Lee Curtis were born; the SPCA set up shop in the name of pooties and woozles everywhere; Denver was founded; The Beatles released The White Album; steel-shank golf clubs were patented; Y toy story premiered Nothing Else Happened on November 22, according to selective amnesiapedia. And you know what? I am inclined to accept it.

–

Ten years ago at C&J: November 22, 2012

BOOS much ado About Nothing. I haven’t written much about the Susan Rice/Benghazi/White House “scandal” because I had this CRAZY IDEA to let the investigation run its course, which would present the inevitable conclusion: the Republicans who ran Susan Rice and the The White House would be revealed as completely clueless, soulless and shameless. Good, that time has come:

Intelligence officials told CNN that the intelligence community, not the white house, changed the now infamous Benghazi talking points given to UN Ambassador Susan Rice before her appearance on several morning news shows in September. CNN quoted both the spokesman for the Director of National Intelligence and an anonymous official “familiar with the wording of the talking points.” The DNI spokesperson said that the only “substantive changes” came from the intelligence community and not the White House.

And now even John McCain has been forced to back down and scoot away in defeat. I don’t know where, exactly, he’ll sneak off, but I have a pretty good idea: not the white house.

–

And just one more…

HEALTH to hot wheels. The Oscars of the automotive world were announced last week and Motor Trend awarded its 2023 Car of the Year award to…a fancy little day spa on wheels with a fancy little price tag of $100,000:

The 2023 Genesis G90 carefully targets industry stalwarts like the Mercedes-Benz S-Classthe bmw 7 seriesand the audi a8 and almost hit the mark. This created a sense of déjà vu in our senior judges, who vividly remember the similar stir made over 30 years ago by another disruptive rookie.: the Lexus LS400. […]

You can adjust the surround sound or simply choose from three preset room settings: Boston Symphony Hall, Bang & Olufsen Home, or Reference. The seats offer a selection of our massage programs in three intensity levels and three session durations.[…]

The Mood Curator offers four programs that tailor ambient lighting, HVAC, moonroof and rear window shade positions, seat massage, sound, and scent selections to suit in a way that manages not to seem contrived or cheesy. And where others offer just one scent, Genesis offers two, one that is more invigorating and the other more relaxing.

Also, this car actually comes with an engine that has tubes and wires and things that spin and things like that. The brochure boasts that it goes from 0 to 60 in just 5.4 seconds. What a thing. I once had a beat up old Chevy Chevette that could do it in 2.4. Once we found a decent cliff to push it off.

Have a tolerable Tuesday. The floor is open… Why are you cheering and booing today?

–

Today’s Shameless C&J Testimonial

Bill in Portland Maine will only get worse with age, as the adulation he knows he’s always deserved grows and grows.

—Atria

–